so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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