How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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