At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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