Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize