Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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