I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
