Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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