You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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