Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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