I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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