I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
