We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
