we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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