it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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