I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
