SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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