So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
