He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
dude. I can hear the air.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
