Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
