Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize
