yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize
