What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
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