JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize