Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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