I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
