how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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