ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
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