Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
