You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
