I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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