so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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