im gay
i know
yea but for you.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
