maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
