I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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