so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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