An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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