You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
