you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
