just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
