I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
bring money and cleavage
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
