Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Randomize