is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
