i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
