I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
