Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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