his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize