I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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