how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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