All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
