Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
