I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
