hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
